Where do you live?
Do you have children?
What does your husband do?
Are you looking for a job?
These were questions I was asked most frequently when working at temporary jobs. Temp work allowed me to transition from full-time employment to self employment. It helped me pay bills while building my business. That was the good news.
Temp work also came with a downside.
Everyone (pretty much everyone) wants to know why you are working on a temporary basis. That’s what the above-mentioned questions represent.
One year I worked in more than 12 places within three months. Assignments ranged from a day here and a week there. In every place, there was one person who asked me personal questions. Can you imagine if I answered everyone truthfully? That would equal a lot of people who know more about me than they ought to know.
Thankfully, I knew better than to respond accurately. I’d say something false, and it was all false. Working to pay bills while building my business didn’t mean that everyone had the right to grill me under the guise of trying to be friendly (that’s what they called their inquisitiveness).
I lied to:
- Keep the peace during the temporary assignment
- Get a paycheck from my employer (the staffing agency that hired me for temp work)
- Guard my employer so they’d continue good relationships with their clients (If I said, “none of your business” when asked questions, my employer would lose business)
Since my husband passed away, I’ve been more diligent about guarding my personal business. No one needs to know how I make money or if I’ll date or anything else about my life outside of people in what I call my security circle.
Some people need to know where I am and what I’m doing for safety’s sake. They know my whereabouts.
Not everyone on the block in which I live is my friend. They’re not in my circle, and I’m quite comfortable with that.
When asked a personal question by a random person, I answer with “why do you need to know?” and walk away the second they get huffy.
You must guard yourself at all times no matter what your marital status or lifestyle. Your business is no one’s business unless you volunteer the information, and it’s important to practice being silent, not providing details that can be detrimental to your security.
If you have to keep the peace, don’t tell the truth until absolutely necessary. Most of all, keep your cool throughout the exchange, not allowing anyone to disrupt your energy.
What questions are you asked most often that you need help to answer?